Monday, 30 June 2014

Miss Magoo (possible genetic connection to Mr Magoo)

If there are ever auditions for a Miss Magoo, let me know, I will be a front runner. Most people like to call me clumsy, accident prone, often living in dream world. 

I like to call it lucky. 

Thanks to Wikipedia you can read a bit about the original Mr Magoo ( the best descriptor from this article "However, through uncanny streaks of luck, the situation always seems to work itself out for him, leaving him no worse than before."

And so, due to clumsiness, eyesight impairment (yes I have 20/20 vision but my view of the world is a little different to others) and a general confused perspective (I think its because I am colourful)- things seem to happen to me. 

Glasses seem to break wherever I go. I am seldom able to cook a meal without either burning myself or the food. Last night I was painting my nails in bed. My Peri says to me "Bab, um so like.. I am not being mean but you are like the clumsiest person I know and you are painting your nails in bed in luminous pink? Is this a good idea?". To which I replied "Don't be silly, of course it is a good idea". 5 minutes later, well, you can imagine. There was a line of bright pink nail polish across our white linen. I then tried to research ways to remove to which Peri recommended it was best to leave. With my history in mind, I would land up creating a hole through  the duvet. I knew this to be true, and so I left it.

Well anyway, if you ask me- it will remain an reminder of a lovely Sunday evening when I painted my nails in bed and ate tea and rusks. 

Mr Magoo is testament to a man with bad eyesight that manages through luck and blessings to get through life magically, unscathed and wonderful. So in the wonderful words from Mr Magoo "O Magoo, you have done it again"... and well its bloody marvelous. Nothing wrong with doing things a little bit differently. 

It is all a matter of perspective. 

With love and light always 

Wednesday, 11 June 2014

I'm sorry, I can't be Perfect

Alcohol Detox. Easy one, right?

In my few days of being totally sober at any social, work- human interaction- I have noticed that there are some people that are not actually very nice. People that I usually like a lot- laugh with and totally understand seem pretty idiotic when 100% sober. Talk about beer goggles! Not just the eyes that do not see when you are intoxicated. But also there are people that when they are drunk, they are totally opposite to the sober self.

It is so easy to see past other people's faults when you are a little bit drunk. That girl that is actually 10 kilos over the weight of "your usual type"- well she looks amazing. That arrogant twat of a man seems like a total gentleman. You don't notice that maybe the friend you have been talking to all night is actually very boring. You are able to open up your heart to anyone who will listen- able to dance like no one is watching. You are able to just be ridiculous and have unrivaled fun.

So yes alcohol has really  bad effects on a person. But the "beer goggles" that possibly make people seem so lovely, fun- seem so perfect- those are nice. I akin them to the rose tinted glasses I would like to wear sometimes through life. Everything can seem so pretty...

When the hangover lifts, and your eyes start to see clearly- the cracks start to show. People are suddenly not as beautiful as they were the night before, or fun, or interesting. Some people turn out to not even be very nice. Reality sets in... and yes, I think it does suck just a little bit.

Give me my rose tinted glasses back, just on loan, so everything can be perfect again.

With love and light, Art in Your Heart

Monday, 9 June 2014

Ebb and Flow

ebb and flow: to decrease and then increase, as with tides; a decrease followed by an increase
Life has its music and its silences. There are leavings and comings, hello's and goodbyes. Moments of being awake and times when we are resting.

I was at my mother's house over the weekend and I came across a picture of myself when I was 21. Skinny. Gorgeous. Tanned. Blond. Short skirted, fanciful and totally and utterly filled with fear. Scared of myself, scared of where the world would take me. I remember the day that photo was taken. I was going to a dress up  party with the theme "what not to wear". I had gotten a pink mini skirt, a pink barbie top, pink earrings, pink eye shadow- and the same pink ensemble for Tatum to wear.  Looking back at the picture I cannot believe how thin and gorgeous- and YOUNG I was. But that day I remember wishing I was thinner and feeling totally insecure. I remember just wanting a good boyfriend. I was so skinny at the time because I was recovering from a particularly painful break up that had crushed my self esteem and made me doubt my sense of self. I was complex, complicated and totally vulnerable.

So yes, when I looked at that photo I did make my entire family  have a moment of silence for the amazing skinniness that  I now yearn for.... but... well.... did it make me happy? No. Almost ten years later, and more than 10 kilos later, I am no longer waif like (chubby sexy is term I like to use). And yes I would love to look like that former 21 year old girl... but instead of spending those 10 years primping, preening and beautifying, I spent them learning to love myself.

I have spent 10 years fighting my fears, delving into my demons, building a career, manifesting dreams and loving. Truly and utterly loving. I met the love of my soul Peri. I found my heartsong cats Rumples and Shanti that every day bring me joy. I worked on my friendships daily, and still do. I spent precious moments eating huge unhealthy meals with family and friends and making memories.

And so, with the ebb and flow of life- there are times we are skinny and times we are not. Times we are fearful and then times we climb mountains. So go forth... climb your mountains, love with your heart and soul and let go of all those former selves- they have had their time and place.

With love and light always